Playing House
by pinocchio
Summary: For a muggle studies class, the seventh years must live in pairs, and take care of a child together. What will happen when James and Lily are paired together? LJ, SBOC, RLOC
1. The Project

**a/n: another story from me! hope you like it!**

**disclaimer: i don't anything thing you recognize.**

**Playing house: Chapter one. **

* * *

"Excuse me." Professor McGonagall said impatiently, trying to get the attention of the seventh years, "Excuse me, would you please be quiet?"

The seventh years quietened after a while, most of them were paying attention except for The Marauders, who were playing with a spider that had just crawled by.

Lily was sitting with her two best friends, Ellie Andrews and Emma Greene.

Ellie Andrews was a very confident girl; she was always in detention for pranking the Marauders. She was loud, feisty, boisterous and outspoken. She was a metamorphagus; Her natural hair was light brown and it fell just past her shoulders, and light aqua eyes. Her mother had died in a car accident and her father was a permanent resident of St. Mungos, he was insane and deaf, so Ellie was very good at sign language, therefore she used it for insults. She had no other family soshe lived at an orphanage during the holidays.

Emma Greene was a bit quieter than Ellie, but she wasn't shy. Her real name was Emmalille, but she hated that, so it was just Emma. She always avoided detention, despite always helping Ellie with her pranks. She is partly veela but no one knows that except Ellie and I. She too is rather smart. Ellie and I fixed her hair so it isn't silvery blonde, as her genetics say it should be, thanks to us she has short strawberry blonde hair and light hazel eyes.

* * *

"They are so immature." Emma said, staring straight at the Marauders,

"I know." Lily said,

"Don't pay them any attention, that's just what they want." Ellie said, as McGonagall started to talk,

"This year, for one month in your muggle studies class, you will be doing a project. This project is called playing house. Seeing as I do not teach muggle studies, I will let Professor O'Neil explain it." she said, moving to the side of the classroom. Professor O'Neil moved to the front of the room. He was a tall middle-aged man, with brown hair and brown eyes.

"Okay, you will be partnered with a member of the opposite sex and you will be living with them for a month in a cottage provided by the school." He said in one breath, "together you will conjure a child, and take care of it for a month, you will basically be playing house. For one week you will be doing it without magic, but after that you will be permitted to use your wands."

"Your cottages are out on the grounds, you do not own them, you are expected to treat them with care, the same goes for your children. If they are treated badly, they will be taken from you and you will fail this subject." McGonagall said, "Your partners have been chosen for you already. They are as follows: Emmalille Greene and Sirius Black,"

Emma groaned, her and her friends weren't exactly friends with the marauders.

"Alice McKenzie and Frank Longbottom."

"Celia George and John Kenneth."

"Ellie Andrews and Remus Lupin."

Ellie winked at him jokingly, as he blushed.

"James Potter and Lily Evans."

Lily sighed angrily as James cheered loudly,

"Peter Pettigrew and Severus Snape. Oh, there seems to be a mistake there, oh well it's too late now." McGonagall said, and then she went through the rest of the list.

Finally when she was finished, Professor O'Neil walked slowly back up to the front.

"Now, gather in your partners, take out your wands." Professor O'Neil said, "and put the tips together, and repeat the words 'Plasture Hasta.' This will create your child."

* * *

There was a shuffling of movement as everyone moved towards their partners, "Potter! Hurry up, I can't believe I'm stuck with you." Lily said,

"Lily! You're looking fine today." James said gleefully,

"Whatever, let's just make a baby."

"Okay! More than happy to! I knew you would come around some day!" James said,

"Potter, nothing is going to happen between us." She said firmly, as they connected their wands, "Names. I'll choose a boy name, you can choose a girl name."

"Elle." He said,

"Harry." Lily said, "Now, thebaby."

* * *

"Plasture Hasta." They said in unision, Lily glaring at James angrily, but her gaze softened when she saw what was happening. A pink light shone from their connected wands.

"Congratulations Miss Evans and Mr. Potter, you are having a girl." McGonagall said, "You may take your wands back now."

"Elle Potter, has a nice ring to it, don't you think Lily?"

"She will be Elle Evans Potter. No that sounds weird, okay Elle Potter."

"Yay!" James said, as a crib formed in front of their eyes. There was a baby lying in it. She was wrapped in a pink blanket and she had beautiful emerald eyes, just like Lily's.

"Hello Elle!" Lily said happily as she picked up her daughter.

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**a/n: What do you think? Do you want me to make it Harry instead of Elle? Because I thought it would be sort of cheesy if I had Harry, it's up to you. Please Review!**

**luv Pinocchio xoxox**


	2. Changing the Nappy

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter,**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter two. **

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"Potter, hurry up and bring our things, Elle is sleepy." Lily said; as she kicked open the door to their cottage,

"I can't believe we have to live like muggles." James said, as he walked in carrying two suitcases.

"Quit complaining, it's not that bad, I did it for eleven years and now I do it every summer." She said, the cottages were five rooms, a kitchen, a living room, a bedroom, a laundry and a large bathroom; yet on the outside they looked tiny.

"What's this?" James asked, pointing to a white rectangular thing.

"A fridge" Lily said, "It's a muggle thing, and it makes food stay fresh."

"But electronics don't work at Hogwarts." James argued,

"Maybe they changed it for the cottages." Lily said,

* * *

"Knock knock!" said Ellie cheerfully, as she walked in with Emma, both carrying their babies, "Wow, your place is nicer than mine."

"Oh! She is gorgeous!" Emma said, as she looked at Lily's baby, "What's her name?"

"Elle." James said proudly,

"That's so close to being my name!" Ellie said,

"Yes, but she's not named after you Ellie, she's named after my mum." James said,

"Oh. Anyway, this is my daughter Mackenzie, but I call her Mack. Remus' idea for the name." Ellie said, her daughter had bright blue eyes, just like Ellie's; she had thin sandy brown hair.

"My son, Ryan, though Black is calling him Sirius Junior." Emma said, rolling her eyes. Ryan definitely took after Sirius; he had dark eyes and a bit of wispy black hair.

"They are so cute!" Lily said, cooing over the babies,

"You're all bloody clucky." James said to himself,

"What was that Potter?" she said,

"I said you're all bloody clucky!"

"Shut it James." Ellie laughed, as Elle starting crying.

"Oh no. You guys better go, before they all start crying." Lily said,

"Bye!" they said, as they walked out the door.

"Shh." Lily said as she rocked Elle back and forth, "Come on hun, please stop crying."

Lily was trying her hardest and not much was happening, she was getting rather frustrated, James could see it, so he got up and took Elle from her.

"I'll calm her down, don't worry." He said kindly, Elle calmed down quickly, and then James put her down in the crib.

"I'm a terrible mother, my own daughter hates me," Lily said sadly, as she burst into tears.

"It's okay, she barely knows you." James said, trying to comfort her,

"It's okay for you! She likes you." Lily cried, James put his arms around her,

"Come on Lils, we've only had her for a few hours." He said, Lily shoved him away,

"Shut up Potter." She said, brushing away a tear, "I have to go and make dinner, I doubt you know how

to cook."

"So we're not even allowed to eat in the Great Hall?" James asked,

"No. We have to live like muggles until next week. I'll cook, don't worry I'm not bad at it."

* * *

"Wow, Evans you can cook." James said, "Can I have more?"

"You're a pig. Whatever, eat the whole thing. Of course I can cook, my mother is a chef!"

"Really?"

They were sitting at the dinner table, eating Spaghetti Bolognese. Elle had been sleeping for a few hours. Lily was trying her best to be civil towards James, but he was being overly cheerful and it was annoying her. He was happy about the fact that he would be living with Lily for the next month, and the fact that he had a daughter with her. At that moment, Elle started to cry.

"You finish your dinner, I'll take her." Lily said, she was very tired already, she would have to get used to the role of housewife. She walked over to Elle's crib and picked her up.

"Are you hungry? Are you sleepy? No you couldn't be, you've been asleep for a while. Is your nappy…oh yes." Lily said as an unpleasant stench arose from Elle's bottom.

"You offered." James said, grinning mischievously,

"Okay." Lily said, placing Elle on the change table and pulling off the nappy. She threw it in the bin and cleaned Elle's bottom.

"Ew, Elle! You got it everywhere!" she said, James started laughing at her, "Oh, you think this is funny, do you James?"

"Yes." He said plainly,

"Well, then you can finish it!" Lily said, "Go on."

"No."

"Yes, do it now!" Lily said,

"Oh, Lily do I have to?"

"Yes, you made fun of me."

"Okay." He grumbled, as he got up from his chair. Lily walked over to the table and cleared the plates away, and started washing them up. She was interrupted when she heard a scream coming from James' direction.

"Ah! She peed on me! She peed on me! In my eye! My eye! Look out Lily, projectile pee!" he yelled, running around clutching his face, while Elle was letting out little giggles.

Lily thought this was hilarious, she burst out laughing.

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**a/n: please review.**

**luv pinocchio.**


	3. Missing

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter,**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**chapter three.**

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"Ready?" the girl asked uncertainly, pointing her wand directly at James,

"Uh huh." James said uncertainly, knowing what was about to come would not be pleasant.

"This is going to be so much fun…for us, not you." Lily said, "Go on Lisa."

"Scourgify!"

A flurry of pink bubbles erupted from James' mouth,

"Yuck!" he said, amidst the soap, "I wash out."

"Thanks Lisa." Lily said, as the fifth year ran out of the cottage to join her friends, they had asked her to help them clean out his mouth because they couldn't use magic,

"Good girl Elle." Lily laughed, "I think it's your bed time."

* * *

Lily lifted Elle off the floor where she was sitting and carried her into the bedroom.

It was a large room, with two big double beds, two bedside tables and a large crib in between. Lily settled Elle in the crib before falling on to her bed.

"Being a mother and a housewife is tiring." She said to herself, she looked over at the alarm clock; it was only 7:30pm. Lily fell asleep there, on top of the bed, in her Hogwarts robes.

James came in an hour later, after carefully examining all the muggle appliances, and saw Lily sleeping, she looked very cold, it was the middle of winter and she was on top of the covers. He covered her up, turned off the light, and went to bed.

* * *

The next morning Lily woke up to find Elle gone. She had walked over to the crib to pick her up and feed her, but she wasn't there. She had disappeared, and so had James. They weren't in the cottage at all. She frantically searched the area around the cottage, and she looked for a note to see if they had left one saying where they had went, there wasn't one.

She ran over towards Ellie and Remus' cottage to see if they were there, she didn't realize that she was still wearing the clothes from the day before.

"Ellie? Are James and Elle here?" she asked breathlessly, Ellie was standing at the stove making

breakfast, looking a bit annoyed about having to act as a housewife,

"Nope."

"Have you seen them?"

"Nope. Sorry."

"Why are you making breakfast? Where's Remus?"

"He is getting ready for classes, he offered to cook, but I said no. I don't mind cooking, or the baby, Mack is so gorgeous, but I hate cleaning!"

"Okay, well I have to find my daughter, I don't really care about Potter." Lily said, rushing out the door.

* * *

When Lily reached Emma and Sirius' cottage it was quite clear that Emma loved being a mother and housewife, the only problem was that she had to be with Sirius.

She had Ryan on the change table and she was changing his nappy when Lily ran in,

"Potter and Elle, have you seen them?"

"No, why?" Emma asked curiously,

"They've disappeared, no note, I have no idea what to do. Oh my god my daughter could be dead,

Emma what if they're dead?"

"Hello Emma, hi Evans! Look here's my little Sirius Junior!" Sirius said, walking into the room, he picked

up his son, who was not wearing a nappy.

"Woah, Sirius Junior, what's with the stench little dude?" he said, "Emma you might need to change his

nappy."

"Oh really? That's what I was trying to do when you came in and picked _Ryan_ up Black." She said

venomously,

"Who's Ryan?"

"Our son."

"No, our son is called Sirius Junior."

"No, his name is Ryan!" she said,

"Aargh!" Sirius cried,

"Haha! Go Ryan!" Emma cheered; Ryan had done the same as Elle and peed on his father.

"Get someone to scourgify him to clean it off, the same happened to James." Lily said quickly, amused by Sirius' misfortune.

* * *

Emma ran outside and asked a sixth year to do it for her, and he agreed willingly, so while Sirius was getting his mouth washed out, Emma took back the baby and put him back on the change table.

"Sirius Junior, why would you do that?" Sirius whined, when it was over,

"It's Ryan."

"Sirius Junior."

"Ryan."

"Sirius Juni…"

"That doesn't matter right now!" Lily shouted, "My daughter is missing!"

"Really?" Sirius asked,

"No. I just ran over here all afraid and upset for no reason." Lily said sarcastically, "YES SHE'S MISSING, AND SO IS JAMES. NOW WOULD YOU HELP ME FIND THEM!"

"Um, Lily I have a question." Sirius said,

"What?" she snapped,

"Why do you look like you didn't go to bed last night?"

"Oh my god." Lily said quietly, looking down at her messy robes, "Just please help me." she said weakly,

"All right, let's go." Emma said, "I'll look in the Gryffindor common room, Sirius you search the head's common room and Lily you look in the cottages area."

"Okay." Lily said.

* * *

She looked all over the place; she even went into Peter and Snape's cottage. Their baby had very…interesting looks. It was a girl who had a very pointy nose that was too big for it's face, and watery blue eyes. Snape had named her Saliva, which Lily thought was very strange. Thankfully, James and Elle weren't in that cottage.

* * *

She sadly trudged back to her cottage and waited for news from Sirius and Emma. She opened the front door to find James sitting on the floor with Elle, playing games.

"Hey Lily, where've you been? We were worried about you." He said,

"POTTER!" Lily screeched, "I WOKE UP TO FIND YOU AND MY DAUGHTER GONE! YOU DIDN'T LEAVE A NOTE! WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU?"

"We went for a walk." He said innocently,

"YOU COULD HAVE AT LEAST TOLD ME! I'VE BEEN WORRYING MY HEAD OFF!" she said, hitting him hard on the arm.

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**a/n: ah! James is such a ding! Please review!  
**

**luv Pinocchio xoxox**


	4. Seewoos

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter, please review.**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter four.**

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"Oh my god, Elle your mother hits very hard." James complained to Elle, Lily was in Arithmancy taking notes for the both of them, while James took care of Elle. Elle's response was a gurgle,

"You understand me don't you?" James said, "Lily doesn't."

"Bababoosh." Elle said,

"Oh my god, Elle! Did you just say your first word?" James asked, "No, bababoosh isn't a word. Damn.

I'm glad I have you to talk to though."

"You know Prongs, talking to a baby makes you look a little crazy." Said a voice.

* * *

It was Sirius; he was standing at the door, with Ryan/Sirius Junior in his arms, he was looking very amused.

"I was talking to her because she keeps me company, and plus talking to your daughter does not make you crazy, it makes you a good parent, which is something that you obviously are not."

"Why?"

"Because the poor little thing has been abused!"

"Abused?"

"Yes, you abused it by trying to call it Sirius Junior. At least Emma has some sense in calling him Ryan!" James laughed,

"Excuse me! Sirius is a very wonderful, strong and masculine name."

"Whatever you reckon Padfoot."

"It is! What kind of name is James anyway?"

"A normal one."

"Shut up! This conversation is over." Sirius laughed,

"You know, these babies are meant to grow up twice as fast as usual, because they are made by a

spell." James said, "I can't wait for Elle to start walking."

"I can't wait for Emma to finally accept that she thinks Sirius Junior is a perfect name for our son. And I can't wait for you and Lily to finally get your act together and realize that you should be together."

"Wow, did Sirius Black actually say something half intelligent?"

"The Sirius Black is a very intelligent creature."

"Yes." James snorted,

"Prongs, snorting is very unbecoming."

"Whatever, back to what you were saying, I know Lily and I are meant to be! She doesn't." he said,

"Seewoos." Elle said,

"What did you say?" Sirius asked, a large grin was forming on his face,

"Seewoos."

"Oh my god, she said my name. Your daughter said my name!" Sirius cried,

"No, that cannot be her first word, no this is not happening to me." James said furiously,

"Seewoos."

* * *

Lily sat in Arithmancy furiously scribbling down theory notes about how the famous mathematician Einstein was actually a wizard. He was exiled from the wizarding world for revealing numerical theories that weren't supposed to be discovered yet in the muggle world. She was writing one copy as it duplicated itself on to another piece of parchment. She couldn't help but let her mind wander, 'does Elle like James better than me?' she thought curiously, 'No Lily concentrate. Einstein the evil dark wizard then tried to pursue a life of…'

* * *

"Lily!" A voice echoed through out the classroom, "Lily!"

Lily looked up to see James hurtling towards her with Elle in the pram and Sirius right behind them.

"LILY!" James yelled,

"James I'm right here, you don't need to yell." Lily whispered, as James and Sirius and Elle reached her,

"Oh sorry, but it adds effect, makes it seem more dramatic."

"Oh well, you can go and be dramatic elsewhere because I am trying to do yours and my work!" she whispered furiously,

"No, something horrible has happened to Elle."

"Oh my god what? Professor may I be excused?" Lily shouted to the Professor, who was absent-mindedly

writing notes on the board,

"Yes yes Eliza, go for it." He said; Lily didn't bother correcting him before pushing James, Sirius and the pram out of the classroom and into the corridor.

* * *

"What is this about? What's wrong with Elle?" Lily asked worriedly,

"She said her first word." James said, Lily noticed that Sirius was beaming his stupid head off,

"Oh wow, Elle! That's so great!" Lily picked Elle up out of the pram and hugged her close, "What did you say Elle?"

"She said Sirius." Sirius told them,

"No she didn't, as if she would say that, you are totally yanking my chain." Lily said, "James what did she say?"

"She said Sirius." He said,

"Don't lie, do you realize that I am trying to write notes for two people for our NEWTS and you have come up here to tell me a…"

"Seewoos." Interrupted a small voice, it was Elle,

"What did you…" Lily started, to be interrupted again,

"Seewoos." Elle repeated, Lily looked horrified, she held Elle as far away from her body as she could as if Elle was contaminated,

"Lily! Just because she said Padfoot's name doesn't mean there is something wrong with her. She is still our daughter." James snapped,

"Sorry." Lily said sadly, and brought Elle back to her, Elle gurgled happily,

"Seewoos."

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**a/n: Hope you liked it, please review blah blah blah the usual **

**R**

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	5. Cookies

**A/N: i gots nothing to say! That is really weird, that has never ever happened to me in my life... there must be something wrong with me...**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter five.**

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Lily, Ellie and Emma sat on the floor of Ellie's cottage playing with their babies.

"This whole not allowed to use magic thing is driving me crazy." Emma grumbled, she was a pureblood, and she was the youngest in her family, so her brothers and parents could all do magic for her, and she wasn't used

"I grew up without it, so I'm fine." Lily said,

"I do it every summer, because of… well, you know…" Ellie said; she hated talking about her parents and the orphanage, she had begged Dumbledore for permanent residence at Hogwarts, but he had politely refused.

* * *

There was an awkward silence for a while, so Lily started trying to teach Elle to say something other than 'Seewoos' but she was failing miserably, the best she got was 'Sawoos' which wasn't close to being any word or name, Ellie was making Mack laugh by changing her hair and eyes constantly and Emma began helping Ryan to walk.

* * *

"I want some cookies." Lily said suddenly, "I'm gonna make some chocolate ones, you guys want some?"

"Okay, yeah!" Ellie said, Emma just nodded,

"Alright, can you watch Elle?"

"Sure." Emma answered, Lily got up and walked over to Ellie's fridge and got out some ingredients, and proceeded to prepare and bake the cookies.

* * *

"Do you reckon James, Sirius and Remus are actually duplicating their transfiguration notes for us?" Lily asked; the girls had brought the three babies into the kitchen so they could talk with Lily,

"I doubt Sirius and James are, they'll probably ask if they can copy Remus' at the end of the lesson." Ellie said,

"Probably." Lily laughed,

"Need a hand there Lils?" Ellie asked,

"No, I'm good."

"Well, actually, oh my god… what is that?" Ellie said, looking at the mixture,

"What? What is it?" Lily asked, suddenly scared for her cookie mixture,

"Eww, it's gross." Ellie said, taking the mixing bowl away from Lily, she stared at the bowl as if she were horrified by it's contents, "Lily, there is something awfully wrong with this mixture, I think it may be poisoned, I'll have to make sure, I can't let you two be poisoned." Ellie said, grabbing a spoon and eating some of the cookie mix, "Oh, I'm not quite sure yet…" she said, then Emma and Lily realized she was joking,

"Ellie! You had me worried, geez you are such a good actress." Lily said,

"Well, thank you! But I don't do autographs!" Ellie laughed, taking a bow.

"You are such a drama queen." Emma added,

"I am not!" she said, "I was trying to make sure that you two didn't die of poisoning from Lily's cooking!"

"Geez that's nice!" Lily scoffed,

"I'm only kidding Lils, everyone knows you can cook." Ellie reassured her,

"Remember that time in first year, before the accident, in the summer holidays when Em and I tried to make the vanilla cake? We mixed up the steps and it was all moist and yucky, and then you made one and it was perfect."

"Yeah that was the best cake." Emma agreed. Mack let out a cry, and started bawling, Ellie sighed and picked her up,

"What's up hun? Oh right, Mack your father is not around to change your nappy, you should know when it's time to do that!" Ellie said, as a whiff of an unpleasant stench drifted past her nose, "Come on then, I guess I have to do one some time." she carried Mack into the next room,

* * *

Five minutes later Ellie returned to the kitchen, looking very…shocked,

"That thing was humongous." She said, "How could a little baby do that?"

"Was that the first time you've done one?" Emma asked,

"Yes!"

"Does Remus do it most of the time?" Lily said,

"Yeah, he said he didn't mind seeing as he has a baby cousin who he takes care of!"

"Oh Ellie you'll have to get used to it." Emma laughed,

"Ellie, do you have any canola oil spray?" Lily asked, as she searched the cupboards,

"Oh is that what that was? Oh, okay, no I don't Remus and I had a spray fight with them the other night while Mack was asleep." She said,

"Emma do you have any?"

"Yeah, I'll just go back to my cottage and get it. Can you guys mind Ryan for a minute or two?"

"Yep!" Ellie said, Emma walked out of the kitchen; they heard the door close as she left the cottage. Ellie hopped on to the bench and sat there while Lily put the cookies in the oven, and then she set the alarm on the oven then turned around to talk to Ellie.

* * *

"So what's up with you and James?" Ellie asked,

"What's up with you and Remus?"

"I asked you first. Tell me." she said,

"Fine, nothing, I think. He stopped asking me out, because we're living together, and he's a great dad to Elle; apart from the incident when they went missing."

"Oh my god, did you, Lily Evans, just compliment James Potter?" Ellie asked, mock shocked,

"Shut up. Now tell me about you and Remus."

"What's to tell? He's a good dad, he's nice, and he's doing my work up in transfiguration."

"Aww, Ellie you have a crush!" Lily said,

"No I don't. If I did I'd tell you."

"Tell her what?" Emma asked, walking back into the kitchen with a bottle of canola spray. She handed it to Lily and picked up Ryan and put him on her hip,

"Nothing, we're just mucking around." Lily said as Ellie stomped on her foot, indicating not to say anything.

"Right." Emma said, raising an eyebrow.

The alarm went off, making Elle cry,

"I'll take care of her Lils, you get the cookies, let's go into the living room Em." Ellie said, picking up Elle and Mack, she followed Emma into the living room.

* * *

"Here we go! Cookies!" Lily said happily, bringing a big plate of cookies into the room, the three girls grabbed one each and started munching on them, they didn't last very long…

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**a/n: please review, soz if it's confusing!**

**luv pinocchio xoxo**


	6. Kiss the Cook

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter, i woh't be updating for while because Christmas is here, and I have my rellies coming over! yay! Anyway, Merry Christmas or Happy Hanakkah or whatever.**

**BTW: I love this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter six.**

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"Lily! I'm back!" James called, as he slammed the door to their cottage shut,

He barely had time to put down his quill and parchment before Lily ran up to him, "Oh thank god you're home!" she sighed, shoving Elle into his arms and running off towards the bathroom.

"Err, Lily, why couldn't you go while I wasn't here?" James called, from his place in the living room,

"Because I don't like leaving Elle on her own." She replied,

"What about Ellie and Emma? Couldn't they watch her?"

"No, because they went to Hogsmeade, I was going to go but I had a headache" Lily called back, as the toilet flushed.

* * *

"Hello children!" said a cheery voice, as Sirius appeared at the door,

"Hi Sirius, what do you want now?" Lily asked impatiently, coming back into the room,

"Oh geez Lils, you make me feel so welcome." Sirius said sardonically,

"No, it's almost eight o'clock, James why are you home so late?" Lily said, glancing at her wristwatch,

"I had detention, but I'm going to cook up a storm for dinner!" he said, in hopes of redeeming himself,

"Okay, but don't use such a cheesy line next time James." Lily laughed,

"Sirius why are you here anyway?" James said, before walking out of the room,

"Prongs, I have a question, why do you start a conversation with me and then walk out of the room?"

"Cos I don't feel like talking to you Padfoot." James replied,

"Oh that's so nice of you." Sirius said sarcastically.

"I agree." James called back, "Shut up now, I gotta start making dinner."

* * *

"Okay, so Lily how are you?" Sirius asked, sitting down on the couch next to Lily, Elle was now sitting in her playpen, continuously whacking a toy hammer on the ground, 'Seewoos' she gurgled,

"Yes Elle, Sirius, a.k.a me, is the best person in the world." Sirius said happily,

"Don't believe a word he says Elle." Lily said, "Sirius, why are you here?"

"Oh yeah, Emma kicked me out of the house because I ripped the couch and put my foot through the wall, oh boy she was angry." He said casually,

"Oh boy?" Lily asked,

"I dunno, I felt like saying it." he answered,

"Well now that you're here you may as well stay for dinner." She sighed,

"Yes, thank-you Lily."

"James make some food for Sirius as well, he's staying!"

"Ok!" James called from the kitchen, "I make-a de pizza! Mwa!"

"Oi Prongs!" Sirius called,

"Si?" he said in his awful Italian accent,

"Don't do the Italian accent, it doesn't suit you." Sirius said,

"Aye." James said,

"James, we got quidditch tomorrow! Aren't you excited?" Sirius cried happily, "The first game of the year!"

"Oh yeah! I totally forgot!" he said,

"James, never say totally again," Sirius shouted monotonously,

"Totally, totally, totally." James called triumphantly,

"You are so childish." Sirius yelled back,

"Takes one to know one Padfoot!"

"You are just proving my point!" Sirius called,

"Whatever. The pizza is ready, come and get some." James called to them, dismissing what Sirius had said, Sirius ran into the kitchen and plopped down on a chair, Lily came in a minute later and strapped Elle into the highchair.

* * *

"Here we go, pizza a la James." James said, placing the tray of pizza on the table, he put a stupid grin on his face and waited eagerly for them to take a bite, Lily noticed that he was wearing a very strange apron that read 'kiss the cook'

"You like my apron? Wanna kiss me?" he asked her, seeing her looking at it,

"No thanks, I'm good." Lily said,

"Then eat the pizza!" he said,

"Um, did you poison it?" Sirius asked uncertainly,

"No, why would I do that, we have quidditch tomorrow, and I need my beaters to be nice and strong." James said, Lily was feeding Elle spoons of mashed banana,

"Come on Lils, eat your pizza, I'll feed Elle!" James said, he was being overly cheerful. He sat down and started shoving spoons of food in Elle's mouth.

"James! Don't just stuff it in! Make it a game, do the airplane thing." Lily said,

James started waving the spoon vigorously in front of Elle's face, throwing mashed banana everywhere, Lily grabbed his hand and directed it in an airplane-like motion.

"Oh!" he said, "This is easy."

* * *

Two hours later, when Sirius had left, Lily and James were in the bedroom, lying on James' bed, with Elle in between them,

"…Your most embarrassing hair cut?" James asked,

"Oh, there have been many." Lily laughed, "But the worst was when I was eight, I went to this new place, and a sixteen year old apprentice person did my hair, she chopped it all off, way too short, and it looked awful."

"I'm sure it didn't." James said sincerely,

"Oh, thanks." She said, "What about you?"

"Oh, it doesn't matter if my hair gets all chopped off, it will grow back within an hour." He said truthfully,

"That's why it's so wild. Okay my go!" Lily laughed evilly, "Who was your first kiss?"

"Marnie Yard, second grade."

"Second grade? Oh my gosh James!" Lily chuckled, she noticed Elle was asleep, so she picked her up and placed her on her crib and tucked her in.

* * *

"I'm gonna give you a question now, and you have to be truthful." James said, Lily nodded, "Who out of the Marauders, would you most prefer to kiss?"

"Ooh, okay, not Peter for obvious reasons, not Sirius because he is always with a new girl, and I wouldn't want to be just one of the bimbos. So that leaves you or Remus. That's hard because you have become more mature this year, but Remus and I have been friends for a long time." Lily considered it for a minute. "I guess because Remus is one of my really good friends and it would be weird, I pick you."

"Really?" James asked,

"Mmm." Lily nodded,

"Well, kiss the cook." James said, he leant in and kissed her lightly, she deepened it. It felt so good to be in his arms, yet it was kind of weird, but he smelt so good. Lily broke away from him, realizing what she was doing, she got off his bed and went back to hers; fifteen minutes later, she was asleep.

* * *

**a/n: I like this chappy, don't you? hehehe, please review!**

**luv pinocchio xoxox**


	7. Messed Up

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter, sorry about the long wait and sorry for the crappiness of this chappy. Have a great new year, I'm going away for two weeks on the seventh, I'll do my best to update before then, but if i don't you'll know why.**

**Good Riddance to 2005, what a crappy year...**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter seven.**

**

* * *

**

Lily woke the next day to the peaceful sound of birds singing out her window and the not so peaceful sound of Sirius, who was next door in his cottage, singing in the shower. She opened her eyes slowly, to see James sitting very close to her, on her bed.

"Morning Lily!" he said brightly,

"Aaah! James, what the hell are you doing?" she asked,

"I believe I am sitting on your bed giving you a cheery greeting." He said plainly,

"Oh, okay." She laughed,

"You look so pretty like that Lily." James said,

"I do?" Lily said, she was taken aback by James' compliment,

"Yes, you do."

"Do I have bed hair?" she asked,

"No."

"You're not making fun of me James?"

"No, I am being 100 honest." He said earnestly,

"Oh, thank you."

"You know Lily, you're a good kisser." He said, with a smug grin,

"Really?"

"Yep, what about me?" James asked,

"I don't know, maybe I need a reminder." Lily laughed, as she gave James a light kiss on his lips, "Hmm, not quite sure yet." She said playfully and kissed him again, this time it was deeper, and more passionate. After about five minutes of making out, she broke away from him.

"Yep, definitely a good kisser." She said, with a smile, "I'm going to go and make breakfast."

"I'm not in the mood for breakfast." James said,

"Well what are you in the mood for?" Lily sighed, immediately regretting saying that, as James tapped

the bed suggestively,

"James, don't be stupid, there's a child in the room and plus we're not even going out." She said,

"Aren't we? It's pretty clear that you want me Lily."

"Don't be so cocky James." She laughed, "I'm not going to sleep with you with Elle in the room."

"She's not in the room though, she learnt how to get out of her crib, and she's crawled into the living room."

"Oh, well I'm still not sleeping with you."

"Then will you be my girlfriend?" he asked,

"James, I don't know if that's a very good idea." Lily said,

"Then why do you keep messing with my head like this Lily?" James shouted, pretending to tear his hair

out, "Gosh! You drive me crazy."

"James, I can't do this right now, I'm going to Ellie's house, I'll take the baby with me." she said monotonously, as she walked out of the room,

"No, Lily wait." James said, following her out into the living room, "You say I'm a good kisser, and then you reject me again? What's with that?"

"I don't know James, I can't figure this out right now." Lily said, now frustrated, she picked Elle up off the floor and stomped out of the cottage, slamming the door behind her. James sighed heavily and flopped on to the couch. Lily was messing about with his head and it was making him go nuts.

* * *

"So you kissed him, and you're still not sure how you feel about him?" Ellie asked,

"Yeah." Lily said, she knew it sounded strange,

"This is so messed up, you've got to stop screwing around with his head." She said seriously, "He won't put up with it you know. He'll end up going out with some bimbo in some lame attempt to make you jealous."

"Woah Ellie, I never knew you could be so serious."

"Shut up!" she laughed,

"I know I have to make up my mind, but it's way too hard. Like, how can I hate him for 6 years, and then change my mind about him just because I've lived with him for a week."

"Has it been a week? That means we can get our wands back now!" Ellie said happily, totally dismissing the topic of James and Lily's relationship,

"Yay, it was getting so annoying not being able to use magic." Lily said,

* * *

A few minutes later they heard a cry coming from Elle, Lily picked her up and checked her nappy. She had just been fed so she wasn't hungry,

"Lily, I think she fell over." Ellie said, "She's learning to walk."

"She is? But she's only a week old." Lily said,

"No, she's not, these babies grow up heaps faster than normal babies." Ellie explained, "At this stage Elle is about eighteen months old. So at the end of the project, she will be six years old, weren't you there when McGonagall told us?"

"I was there, I probably wasn't listening."

"That's weird."

"I know, not like me at all."

"Ah, Seewoos." Elle said, as she tried to stand up,

"I can't believe she's learning to walk, this is so cool." Lily said excitedly,

"Yeah, you're lucky, Mack has barely said her first word, and I'm kind of worried that she's a slow developer."

"I'm sure she's not. What was her first word?"

"Pwang." Ellie said, "It's not really a word but it's close to being prank."

"Seewoos." Elle said loudly,

"Lils, you really need to teach her a new word."

"I know; Sirius' head is already big enough. He's making Emma tear her hair out."

"Why?"

"Because he won't stop calling the baby Sirius Junior and he keeps trying to pick up girls while she's with him."

"Oh, bet she has a thing for him." Ellie said,

"I don't know, maybe." Lily answered as Elle fell over again, "James is going to be so pissed off that he

didn't get to see this."

* * *

**a/n: hope it was good enough, i'm not sure i like this chappy. please review. **

**signing out, **

**pinocchio**


	8. A few drinks too many

**A/N: I might not update for a few weeks, i'm going on holidays, I'll try to update before then but if not, sorry. **

**Disclaimer: not mine.**

**Chapter eight. **

**

* * *

**

"You mean I missed her first step?" James asked angrily,

"Yeah." Lily said,

"This is so unfair, how come you got to see it?" he grumbled,

"Because I was with her when it happened, and besides, I didn't hear her first word!"

"Oh please, Seewoos is not a word!"

"It is too!" Sirius said, appearing in the doorway, their front door seemed to be permanently open,

"Sirius not now, go away." James said,

"Whatever." He said, walking away muttering to himself,

"Chiuro." Lily said, pointing her wand at the door, making it slam shut, "I love having my wand back."

She noticed that James was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands, looking very annoyed.

"James, it's not that big a deal."

"It is to me, Lily."

"Well, I'm sorry. How can I make it up to you?"

"Go out with me."

"James." She warned, "Think of something else."

"Fine." He grumbled, "Kiss me."

"I kissed you this morning!"

"Yes and then you messed around with my head and made me go nuts, now kiss me and then tell me what is going on," He said, leaning in and kissing her deeply on the lips, Lily loved kissing James, but she

really didn't want to go out with him, but she really wasn't sure what she wanted at the moment.

* * *

"So?" James asked, when they had broken apart,

"I don't need a relationship at the moment James." She told him, before getting up and leaving the cottage.

"Oh my god!" he shouted angrily, slamming his fist against the wall. He picked up Elle and walked out the door.

* * *

Ten minutes later, James sat in the grounds, helping Elle to walk.

"Come on Elle, you can do it!" he coached as Elle attempted to waddle towards him, "Walk over to Daddy Elle!"

"Oh, she is so cute." A voice said, James looked up to see a girl standing in front of him. She kneeled down beside him,

"I'm Sarah." She said, she had dark brown hair and blue eyes; she was a Ravenclaw sixth year, so she wouldn't have been involved in the Playing House project,

"I'm James, and this is Elle, my daughter." James said,

"Oh yeah, you have to do that project thing in seventh year." Sarah said,

"You're lucky you have such a cute baby, I saw one, it had a fat face with a very big nose." She laughed, James immediately knew that this weird baby was the child of Peter and Snape,

"Oh my god, what's that smell?" Sarah asked,

"That would be my daughter's nappy." He said, "I have to go and change this, you wanna walk with me?"

"Um, yeah ok." She said,

* * *

They walked back to the cottage, talking about everything; including the problem with Lily. Sarah suggested he shouldn't act so desperate to be with her, she said he ought to stop trying to impress her, or maybe he should just listen to her.

When they reached the cottage, James quickly changed Elle's nappy and then set her down in her crib to go to sleep. He opened two bottles of butterbeer, one for him and one for Sarah,

"Thanks." She said, as he handed it to her,

"So you reckon, that if I don't try to impress her, be myself, not be desperate and listen, she'll want to be with me?"

"James it's not that easy."

"Why not?"

"Because it just isn't. She's not going to fall for you in five seconds, it takes time.You have to let her know that you actually care and you actually like her, because at the moment, it doesn't seem that way."

"Oh, I can do that, thanks so much Sarah."

"It's okay, but I have to go, I'm going to Hogsmeade with my boyfriend, I'll talk to you later James." Sarah said, "Thanks for the butterbeer."

* * *

Sarah got up from her seat and walked over to the door, just as she was about to open it, it was opened by Lily, who stumbled in laughing,

"Oh, hello. Who are you?" Lily said,

"Hey Lily, I'm Sarah Littlewood, sixth year, Ravenclaw." Sarah said brightly,

"How do you know who I am?"

"You're Head Girl."

"I am?" Lily asked, "Cool!"

"Uh, yeah. I gotta go, bye Lily, seeya James." Sarah said, closing the door behind her as she left.

"Lily, are you drunk?" James asked, walking over to her, to help her stay upright,

"No! Okay, just a little." She said, "You see, I was kind of upset. So I went to Hogsmeade for a drink."

"Or five. You went by yourself?"

"Yah!" Lily said, clawing at his shirt and pulling him closer, "I might wanna spew on you later."

"Lils, you're breath stinks."

"What about your breath?"

"No Lils, that's still yours."

"Oh." Lily said, "I'm sleepy! Where is the bubby?"

"She's sleeping."

"Cool! Let's wake her!" Lily said, running away from James and towards the bedroom, unfortunately she

didn't make it as she had tripped over her own feet in her drunken state, James helped her up and placed her on her bed.

"Lils? You awake?" he asked, he was answered by a long and loud snore.

* * *

**a/n: hope you liked it, please review. **

**signing out, **

**pinocchio.**


	9. Forbidden Kiss

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter, sorry about not updating for so long, but my account was locked.**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter nine. **

**

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**

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god." Lily groaned, as James pulled open the curtains, her head was pounding furiously, and the light was burning her bloodshot eyes, "Light, too bright, shut now… please."

James sighed and pulled them shut,

"Dark, good. Headache bad." Lily said, putting a pillow over her head, "It hurts James."

"I know, I have experience in hangovers, believe me." he said, handing her a potion, "I told Remus about your er… excessive consumption of alcohol, and he gave me this. "He said it'd cure your headache, and make you feel a lot less crappy."

"Gimmee." She said, snatching the potion and downing it fast, "It's not working, tell Remus his potion sucks.

"He also said it'll take a few minutes to come into effect."

Lily groaned and fell out of the bed with a thump, "Ow! I don't like that bed anymore." She grumbled, "I'm going to sleep on your bed. Remus' potion isn't working."

"It'll take a few minutes, be patient."

"No, I think I drank the entire fire-whiskey population of Hogsmeade."

"I wouldn't be surprised." James muttered,

"What did you say?"

"I said, I just won a prize."

"For what? This fucking potion won't work."

"Lily! Do not swear! There is a child in the room!"

"That never stopped you. It's not working." She grumbled, closing her eyes and

trying to sleep. James tripped over a pile of Lily's clothes and landed on the ground

with a thud.

"James! I am trying to sleep, would you like me to castrate you with a butter knife?"

"Sorry." He said, trying to get out of the room, only to find that the door was jarred,

Lily groaned again as her hair turned green.

"Oh my god, Sirius spiked the potion!" James said, thankfully Lily didn't hear, because she was curled up asleep under his bed covers. James ran over to the window, pulled it open and jumped out.He ran around the outside of the cottage and ran in through the front door and he picked up Elle "Elle, it's so cold out there, we must wrap up!" he said to her as he grabbed a coat and wrapped it around himself and Elle, "There we go, all nice and warm." He said, and then he walked out the door again.

* * *

"Sirius!" he shouted, as he banged on the door of Emma and Sirius' cottage it was locked, unlike his own, which was almost always open

"James?" Emma asked, as she walked into the living room in her dressing gown with Ryan in her arms, he had a bib on, so obviously Emma was in the middle of feeding him.

"Where's Sirius?" he asked, as they went back into the kitchen and sat down,

"He went out to find Ellie, she stole his secret stash of Zonkos and Honeydukes products." Emma explained,

"Oh, okay." James said, not really sure what to do.

"So?" he said, "How are things between you and Sirius?

"What do you mean?"

"Well, are there any developments in your relationship?" he asked frankly,

"No, our 'relationship' has never actually been that much of a 'relationship' anyway." She said, as Ryan dribbled some mashed up banana on his bib.

"Really?"

"Yep, Sirius spends too much of his time womanizing the entire population of female students to even notice me. What about you and Lily?"

"Not sure. She keeps sending me mixed messages. It's bugging me. I really like her, you know?" James said, "But she just wants to be friends, I think."

"We all know how much you like her James. She thinks you just want her because she's the only one who refuses to go out with you or whatever."

"This sucks. Anyway, I have to go and find Sirius." James got up from his seat and made for the door.

"Okay, bye James." Emma said glumly, wiping the food off Ryan's mouth, James sat down again and pulled his chair closer to hers,

"Hey, don't worry about him. He'd be lucky to have you, but if he can't see it, then don't bother."

"You think?" she asked, brushing away a tear,

"Yeah, of course, don't worry, he's not worth it."

"But why would you say that? He's your best friend."

"Yeah, but I'm not a girl and I know Sirius can do dumb things." James reasoned,

"He's being stupid."

"Thanks James." She said,

"It's alright." He said, giving her a hug. After a few minutes she reluctantly let go, their faces were millimeters apart. Before they knew it, they were kissing each other passionately. As quickly as the kiss had begun, it had ended,

"Oh my god. I'm so sorry." Emma said,

"Yeah, I have to go." James said, turning around and walking out, not daring to look back at her.

* * *

**a/n: hope that was good! please review, major cliffie i know. **

**signing out, **

**pinocchio**


	10. Hair Dye

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter,**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter ten.**

**

* * *

**

James opened the door of his cottage and stepped inside, he sighed heavily before a green monster attacked him. But then he realised it was Lily with her green hair,

"Potter!" she yelled, grabbing him and slamming him up against the wall, for a girl she was very strong,

"Yes Lily?" he asked nervously, he was certain he had been sprung,

"My hair is green!"

"Yes I know; Sirius spiked your hangover potion."

"Right, then I just might go and murder him instead."

"Yeah, good idea. And if you want to make out with him, then I'd be cool with that!" James called after her as she stormed out the door in her silk nightgown.

* * *

"I am so not cool with that! Ugh, I am such an idiot! Why did I have to kiss her?" he asked himself,

'Yeah, but it's not like Lily's your girlfriend or anything.' He thought,

"Yeah! But still! She's a chick, and they think different to guys! She'll be pissed if she finds out!" James shouted at the wall, he was having an argument with his brain, and he wasn't quite sure who was winning.

* * *

"Sirius Orion Black, get your arse over here right now!" Lily screeched, Sirius didn't pay her any attention as she stormed towards him, her night flapping in the wind behind her as she walked,

"Where are my things? I know you stole them Andrews!" Sirius shouted at Ellie,

"I didn't take your Zongos and Honeydukes stuff, I have my own money, I don't steal." She said, "It's probably in your dorm or your cottage or somewhere."

"I know you did!"

"Oh, shut up Black." Ellie said, and walked away, "By the way, you're about to get the shit kicked out of you." She added over her shoulder,

"What?" he turned around and saw Lily, with green hair, fuming. She was livid, "Oh, hi Lily." He said nervously,

"You spiked my potion, and now my hair is green!" she seethed, slamming him up against the castle wall,

"Yeah." He said slowly, "About that…"

"I am going to kill you!" she yelled, pushing her arm into his neck,

"I can't breathe!" he choked,

"Change it back! Now!" she shouted,

"I can't…it will last…until…next…week." He spat out slowly,

"I'm not going to wait that long Black! Fix it!"

"It's not possible!" he choked,

"Well make it possible!"

Sirius' eyes darted over to where Ellie was standing near the beech tree, laughing her head off, her hair flickered many colours as she laughed,

"Hair dye?"

"What?" Lily released him, and he slid down the wall and onto the

ground.

"Hair dye. Don't you know what that is?" he said in a raspy voice,

"Of course I know what it is! I'm muggle-born! Are you stupid?"

"No, you can use that."

"And where am I going to get that here? In the wizarding world?"

"Ask Ellie or Emma."

"Ellie is a metamorphagus and Emma's hair is magically changed anyway! No one here will have dye, because they are all magical!"

"Oh, wait! I know where you can get some."

* * *

"You sure she won't come in here?" Lily asked nervously, as they walked into the office, Lily had received many strange looks as she stormed across the grounds in her dressing gown,

"No, of course not. She's out preaching to the leprechauns in the greenhouse. She wants them to come over to the good side."

"But they are on the good side?" Lily said,

"I know that, but she's convinced they're evil." Sirius said, pushing over a pile of papers. They were in Professor Toylette's office. She was the divination teacher and she didn't believe in changing any part of your body with magic, so therefore, to keep her purple hair looking nice and purple, she dyed it.

"It's purple Black." Lily said,

"Yes, but you can change the dye with magic."

* * *

"Lily! Thank God you're back to normal!" James said happily as Lily walked out of the bathroom of their cottage. James was sitting on the ground playing with Elle who was now three years old; they had been parents for two weeks.

"You didn't like me with green hair?" Lily asked innocently,

"You know what I mean."

"Dadda, trains!"Elle shouted,

"Okay, Mummy will play trains with you, Daddy is making dinner." He said to her,

"You started dinner?" Lily asked,

"Yeah." He said,

"I don't have to force you?"

"Nope!" he smiled, "The vegetables are on the stove and the chicken is in the oven and the dishes are washing themselves." He pointed to a scrubbing brush, which was washing some pots.

"Ah thank you James." She said, "This is a pleasant surprise."

"Well, you deserve it."

Lily kissed him on the cheek and sat down next to Elle. James touched his cheek where she had kissed him and walked slowly back to the kitchen.

* * *

**a/n: please review, **

**signing out, **

**pinocchio**


	11. Padfoot shaped cookies

**A/N: I hope you like this chapter,**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter eleven.

* * *

**

"She kissed me!" James yelled as he ran through the door of Sirius' cottage,

"Sirius! She kissed me!" he yelled again, Emma ran out of the bedroom in only a towel,

"James! Don't tell him that! I thought we weren't going to tell them what happened between us?"

"No! Not that!" James said, "Lily kissed me!"

"Oh, congratulations." Emma said,

"Yeah, thanks. Where's Sirius?"

"I dunno, he's always going somewhere, leaving me to do all the housework."

"That's not fair."

"I know." Emma said, "You know what he said yesterday when he came home from Hogsmeade."

"Oh god, was he smashed?"

"Surprisingly no, but he came in and said, 'Er, Emma, where is my dinner?' and I just blew up."

"Too right, that is so wrong." James said, he was disgusted and ashamed of Sirius,

"And then we had a fight and he called me Emmalille, and that was the last straw, I threw his clothes out the front door and haven't seen him since."

"Well, I'll deal with him." James said angrily,

"He's probably living in the forbidden forest, I bet he's delirious and crazy from lack of food and people to piss off." Emma sighed, then realizing she was wearing only a towel, she said, "I'm going to go and get dressed now." then walked back to the bedroom, leaving James in the living room. He ran out the door and towards the forest, which was rather close to the large group of cottages.

* * *

James had been in this forest many times, so it wasn't scary for him, and even if something did happen, he could easily just transform and run off.

"Padfoot!" he called, "Padfoot, are you out there? It's an emergency!"

James came to a clearing where he found a big black dog drinking from a lake, "Sirius!" he said, "Transform now, it's urgent."

He watched the dog slowly morph into a dirty,worried looking Sirius Black.

"What is it? Is there something wrong with Sirius Junior? Did he choke on the Padfoot shaped cookies I asked Emma to make him?"

"No, Padfoot is not a shape, it's a nickname, and that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Hey, James if you wanted some Padfoot shaped cookies, you should have asked."

"No, I don't want any Padfoot shaped cookies. The problem is you."

"Me?"

"Yeah, you're being a sexist bastard towards Emma. She's sick of it, and so am I. So, if you don't clean up your act, I'm going to get very pissed off."

"Right." He said, "Where'd you get that from?"

"Straight from the horse's mouth, you practically just admitted to being stupid, and Emma told me about it. That's why she kicked you out."

"Oh."

"Yeah, so just…er stop being an idiot." James said,

"Alright then." Sirius said, edging slowly away from James,

"Oh, and have a shower, you stink."

* * *

Lily sung an old song from when she was little, it sounded off-key and out of tune, but she didn't care.She was in the shower, finishing off washing her hair.

"Hello Lily." someone said, Lily screamed,

"James! Get out!" she turned to face the wall so that he couldn't see much.

"What?"

"Get out! What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing. Lily, what's up?"

"Nothing. What do you mean?"

"How long are you going to keep doing this?"

"This?"

"Yes, this."

"What's this?"

"This dance we do." James said, Lily was feeling very uncomfortable, seeing as she was naked in the shower, the water was going cold and James was in there, acting very relaxed about the whole thing.

"What do you mean?"

"You keep leading me on, and then going all hot and cold on me!" he said loudly,

"I do not."

"You do, first you make out with me, then you go off me, and then you kiss me on the cheek, I'm getting mixed messages. I need to know what's up."

"James, turn around." She said, James did as he was told and face the window; Lily got out of the shower and pulled a towel around herself,

"James what are you waving at?"

"The birdies." He said happily, waving to something outside the window, "Are you done yet?"

"Yeah, you can turn around." James turned around,

"So?"

"So… let's give it a go." Lily said,

"What?"

"I said, let's give it a go."

"Really?" Lily nodded, "I don't have to fight, cos' I had this whole speech planned out."

"No, no fighting."

"Wow, that simple huh?"

"Yep."

"Well then, I wonder what else is simple?" he said with a raised eyebrow,

"James, I only just agreed, don't go getting any ideas." She said, walking out of the bathroom, giving him a quick kiss before entering the bedroom and closing the door behind her.

* * *

**a/n: please review.**

**signing out**

**pinocchio**


	12. What happened?

**A/N: I am an awful person, i haven't updated in over a month, but i'm sick at home so i decided to make sure i updated each of my stories!**

**Just to let you know that once i have finished these three stories (switched, playing house and diary fights return) I will not be writing anymore stories on fanfiction.**

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**Chapter twelve.

* * *

**

Jamesburst through the door ofRemus' cottage trying to make a dramatic entrance, but his huge grin faded when he realized no one was home. There was a note on the coffee table though,

_Remus, _

_I have gone into the forest, Mack has a rash, and I'm going to find some Hockey leaves to make it clear up. _

_I'll be back in an hour or less, I'll take Mack with me. _

_Love Ellie. _

Love Ellie? James questioned, something might be going on here, or maybe someone has a crush. James set off for the forest determined to find Ellie so he could tell her about his new girlfriend.

* * *

"Ellie!" he called, as he entered the forest, making sure no one was watching,

"Ellie Andrews!"

"Potter. I'm over here." Ellie said, James turned around to find her; he had been

going the wrong way.

"Oh, hi. Guess what!"

"What?"

"It's huge news! It's so big!" he yelled,

"What is?"

"You'll die when you hear it!" he was so excited by it,

"Well, that's if I ever get to hear it." she said sarcastically,

"What?"

"Just tell me."

"Right, well I have a new girlfriend."

"Really, I'm so happy for you. Not. James that isn't big news." She said, "You always

have new girlfriends."

"It's not the fact that I have a new girlfriend, it's who my new girlfriend is."

"Who is it?" Ellie asked, her eyebrow rose slightly as her hair flickered white, her

eyes flashing yellow,

"Eww, Ellie don't do that, you look like a cat!"

"Sorry." It changed back to normal, "Who is it?"

"My new girlfriends name is Lily."

"Lily? So now you're going out with people who have the same name as her? Before

it was people who look like her and now this? James you need help." Ellie said,

"No, her name is Lily Evans."

"You got me all worked up for that? It's not even April Fools' Day. It's not even

April!"

"No Ellie, Lily said yes to me, I didn't even ask."

"Really? That's weird."

"And I didn't have to give my speech."

"What speech?"

"Never mind."

"Well I'm very happy for you James." She said,

"Me too."

"Now help me find some Hockey Weed, Mack has a rash."

* * *

Lily came out of her cottage with Elle in her arms, she couldn't stop smiling for some reason; she quickly located Emma, Sirius and Remus over near the lake and walked over to them, and set Elle down next to Ryan.

"No Black, I don't want to hear it." Emma said, turning away from him with her arms folded,

"Please Emma!" he begged,

"What's going on?" Lily asked Remus,

"He wants her to forgive him for being a sexist pig, and she won't." Remus whispered, "Why are you grinning like a goon?"

"Because, James and I are officially a couple." She smiled wider,

"Oh, congratulations!" Remus said as Emma and Sirius squabbled,

* * *

At that moment James wandered out of the forest with Ellie and Mack, who was toddling along slowly, with a bunch of weeds in her hand. At the sight of Elle and Ryan she ran towards them, falling over a root on the way but quickly getting up again.

James didn't see that there was a root protruding out of the ground, the same one that Mack had fallen on, and he clumsily tripped over it, breaking his glasses, he got up and skipped towards Lily and gave her a big hug,

"Lily? Have you moisturized your skin lately? It's very rough, you're very tan as well." He said, and then realized he was hugging a tree. Hemade another attemptand hugged a blushing third year Ravenclaw who quickly ran off giggling with her friends.

"James, I'm over here." Lily called, James put his arms out in a zombie-like manner and walked slowly towards the voice, Lily pulled him toward her and pointed her wand at his face, "repairo." The glasses quickly mended themselves and Lily pulled his face down to hers for a kiss.

Sirius dramatically gasped and Emma laughed at him, because he started choking.

"Er Lily?" Remus asked frantically,

"Shit." Ellie said, trying to slip off her school shoes and robe,

"What?"

Lily asked, turning towards Remus, "Oh my god." She shrieked, "Elle!"

* * *

**a/n: hope you liked it, i'm in the mood for cliffies today, as you will know if you have read chapter sixteen of switched!**

**please review, **

**signing out, **

**pinocchio**


	13. Betrayed

a/n: no more updating anything after this, it's back to school in a few days. Chapter thirteen

* * *

Lily cried hysterically as James ran towards the lake. Elle was screaming and drowning, slowly floating away.

'Oh my God! It's so cold!' James said, he still had his uniform on, and it was getting heavy as he waded in as fast as he could, 'Elle! I'm coming!'

Ellie was splashing as she slowly went beneath the surface of the water, suddenly, her high-pitched screaming ceased, it was deadly quiet, Lily stopped crying and looked at the water, it was a dark murky brown. Emma, Sirius, Ellie and Remus watched in worry as James dove into the dark water.

James reached Elle and grabbed her arm and pulled, but there was something else pulling her down. It was the squid. James grabbed his wand and stunned the squid, sending it back down into the darkness of the lake. He pulled Elle out of the water and collapsed, as Remus and Ellie worked to resuscitate Elle.

* * *

Later, while sitting in James and Lily's cottage, Emma and Lily were talking. James was in the shower, finally agreeing to wash himself and get rid of the unpleasant stench he wanted to transfer onto Snape. Lily cradled Elle affectionately, as they talked about her new boyfriend, James.

'I just gave in after awhile, I knew it would happen soon, and he kept asking.' Lily laughed, 'It just felt right.'

'You're meant to be.' Emma said,

'What about Sirius? Anything happening there?'

'No, he doesn't even know I'm here. What really bugs me though, is when he comes back here flaunting his new girlfriends. I can't take it much longer Lils!' she said, 'So, hold on to James he's a keeper.'

'Thanks.' Lily put Elle down in her crib for a nap, James was singing loudly and very out of tune-ly in the shower,

'I mean, he adores you; and it doesn't hurt that he's so hot either!'

'And he's a good kisser.' Lily added,

'I know!' Emma blurted out,

'Excuse me?' Lily asked,

'I mean, well-'

'Did you kiss James?' Lily asked, her face slowly turning red,

'No! Well…'

'Did…You…Kiss…James?' she said slowly,

'Just once!' Emma squeaked, 'But, we were drunk and it was a total mistake, Lily, I—'

'Get out.' Lily said calmly.

'What?'

'Get out.' Lily said icily, moving towards the door,

'Lily, I—' Emma began,

'Just leave.' Lily opened the door, holding back her tears. Emma walked out; she stopped trying to make an excuse. Lily immediately went into the bedroom and threw all James' clothes into a bag.

* * *

'Hey Lily Pily!' James said, as Lily walked into the living room, he was wearing only a towel and was sitting on the couch, 'Are you going somewhere? Why do you have a bag?'

'You're leaving.' She said, monotonously,

'Good one, so seriously, what's with the bag?'

'You're leaving.' She said,

'Seriously, tell me the truth.'

'Get out James'

'What?'

'Just get out!' she yelled, throwing the bag at him,

James got up from the couch. 'Why? What's going on?'

'I want you to leave now!' she yelled, tears rolling down her face.

'Why?' he asked, as she pushed him out the door.

'Ask Emma!' Lily slammed the door right in his face. Elle began to cry, 'Oh, not now Elle.'

* * *

'Lily?' a voice called from outside,

'James, I told you to go away!' she said, her voice broke,

'It's Ellie, let me in!'

'No!'

The lock clicked, and Ellie walked in, 'You forget, I am a witch.' She said, tucking her wand away in her pockets 'Are you okay?'

Elle was still crying, Lily was just sitting on the couch, staring blankly at the wall; Ellie picked Elle up and patted her on the back, 'Lils are you okay?'

'No.'

'Tell me, what happened?'

'Emma and James.'

'Emma and James? What? I don't understand.'

'They… you know!'

'Oh!' Ellie said,

'It's not fair, I just agreed to go out with him, and he goes and does this. What kind of guy does this?'

'I don't think James would do it on purpose.' Ellie reasoned,

'He did!'

'He's not the type, unlike Sirius, James has never dated more than one girl at a time, and I mean, James has wanted to go out with you since we were first years! As if he would screw it up on purpose.' Ellie said,

'Maybe I should just go and mess around with all the guys in our grade.' Lily said,

'Come on Lils, don't sink to his level.'

'Why not? I think you should fight fire with fire. So that's what I'll do.'

* * *

**what did you think? please review.**


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